Dirty jokes (NSFW)

A rabbit and a bear went to take a crap in the jungle.
the bear then sez to the rabbit "to you have a problem where when u take a crap it sticks to your fur?"
The rabbit says "No"
The bear then took the rabbit and wipes his arse. :P

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A man gave 2 asprins and a glass of water to his wife.
She says "whats this for? i dont have a headache"
He says "good.. then lets F***"

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A man went to a whore house with only 2 dollars
The owner says " thats ok. Go up to the room there we have a dead hooker"
Then the guy went and when he finished he came down.
The owner asked "how was it?"
The guy replied " it was good. The only problem is her nose kept running"
Owner replied " ahh. shes must be full"

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There was a girl without legs on the beach. and she was crying
a guy came along and asked her " why are u crying?"
she says " all my life i have never been kissed"
so the guy kneels down and gave her a kiss.
the girl then cried twice as hard.
the guy said " wats it now?"
she says " all my life i have never been f***ed
the guy picks her up...........
and threw her in to the sea..
he says " well you're f***ed now..!!"